Gift from Chris John

Well, W was up in the middle of the night Saturday doing our flood irrigating. The water was coming very fast, and he was battling two gopher holes on the east side of our property. I wasn't any help--Had stayed up intending to help, then was sound asleep when the alarm went off to irrigate. He had all of the sandbags in use when I got up to check on him. I hate gophers. Irrigation should be such a simple thing--open the valves, take the water, shut the valves, not open the valves, then watch and see where it is going to run out of a gopher hole and down the road.... He went to bed around 10:30 am or so, as had to work Sunday evening.

Danielle popped over a while after he had gone to bed. I forgot she had ongoing car troubles. Her car was having trouble starting. She just got it from after over a week at the mechanics--Luke's Auto Body on Glendale Ave, by the way--honest and good mechanic. Brother John had also called and said the bishop wanted to meet with me at noon. I had Danielle follow me over to Auto Zone and asked the guy to check her battery, alternator, starter, whatever and see what was wrong with the car. I left her in his hands (not literally, but you know what I mean) and went to meet with the bishop. I was pretty certain I was finally being released from my job as second counselor in the Relief Society. I originally was called to serve under Doyleen Gustafson, and along with Nan Hinton. I was then called to serve with Chris John and another counselor who ended up in Independence Ward, then was asked to serve again with Chris John and Phyllis Clawson. It has been a hard, but rewarding calling for me, that I have always felt inadequate in.

I come from a very inactive family, or they were the entire time I grew up. If you have heard the term, Jack Mormons, well, that was our family. My mother had to work full time when mothers did not work, my dad had a drinking problem, and we aren't speaking water. We were poor financially....but oh, what a wonderful family full of love. Looking back, I really got to experience the clash between the gospel and Mormon culture, per say, but religion and church attendance was just confusing to me. I probably smelled like cigarette smoke, came from an inactive family, and lets just say reception at church was a bit lukewarm, and then in my teen years, it didn't really seem to matter to anyone there whether or not I showed up, so mostly I didn't. I did take seminary, however. I didn't have to sacrifice sleep like my children did if they went--our school had release time seminary. I loved seminary. I learned to love the gospel of Jesus Christ. I loved my teachers and some of my classmates. I went to Rick's College....got my nursing degree...and struggled with more Mormon Culture. Living first in Virginia, then here in Phoenix (although I did have a long period of inactivity, here, too) I think I am finally converted to the gospel.

Ok, I have a few hang ups. Driving makes me really nervous, especially heavy freeway traffic. I am terribly nearsighted, and have found out that predisposes me to a real problem with depth perception. The best example I can give you is when I pull into a gas station to get gas, I can think I am on top of the pump, and be six feet away from it, or vice versa. I have a problem recognizing and remembering new faces, or any faces and names just do not stay with me. Once I get to know you and you are my friend, I can remember you, but meeting new sisters each week and remembering their names--Well, a year later, I can still be trying to come up with their name. Times that by 50, and it is a little hard and embarrassing, and maybe even offensive to sisters when you can't remember or forget their names. That ups my anxiety, which compared to my mother's high anxiety, where she won't even DO certain social settings, and callings are out of the question, I say, at least I try. My shortcomings I usually cover up with humor. If you can't laugh at yourself you might cry, and laughter usually puts us all at ease a bit. That brings us to conducting Relief Society. I would almost rather be run over by a truck. The good news if I WAS run over by a truck, I wouldn't have to conduct, now would I? I get so nervous, that I have really screwed up doing it. Try forgetting the opening prayer, who was praying, opening song, who was teaching. Introducing the new sisters is torture--and you have to teach once in awhile. I can do ok now with a lesson, but to come up with something to teach...and present it......so very frightening.....but I have tried. I've gotten a little bit better, but folks, I am no Sherry Dew. (I don't need to be, most of the time I am content just to be Sandy Nelsen, slight flake and neurotic, but loving, friendly......who are you now, anyway.....person).

The bishop did release me and call me to be CTR 6 teacher in the Primary. This is the day after the rapture was to happen folks, and I thought I had died and gone to heaven! No, I was just going to Primary and work with kids!!!! Except for having to teach sharing times (which if I work it right, maybe I can pawn that off on Kim Peck....or just do it and stress).....I was so happy. I love Chris John. She is so special to me. She put up with me. I wish I had helped her more and whined less. She does not whine. I don't want her calling. People expect too much, aren't nearly as forgiving as you would expect a chosen people to be....and she is one of the most Christlike people I know. She put up with me, and wanted me on her team....and I wanted to leave....makes me cry today.

I got a text message this morning. It was from Chris. Made me think how much I am going to miss her text messages....If you are not LDS (Mormon) you have no idea how it is--if you serve in the Relief Society, you are cut off from the Primary. If you serve with the youth, you practically live at the church with them with all of their activities, so you don't go back to the church and mingle, you are crashed some place recuperating (or that is what I think, as never served in the youth, just provided them with 9 teenagers to help bulk up their ranks).

Chris said she was not feeling well, and had left a gift for me on my car. I went out and found the gift you see in the top picture...with a lovely card I will keep for all of this lifetime--and this little precious WillowTree statue of a grandmother (looks just like Chris John, btw, not me) and her precious little grandchild. I took pictures of it, and need to find or create just the perfect spot for it....as I am really trying to dejunk my house before I end up on an episode of hoarders, but that is a different blog entirely.

I'm just not a natural leader. I'd say I am a supporter. For now, I am so happy and so blessed to be able to just to hang out in Primary and enjoy the sweet (most of the time) spirit of the children and remember who loves them the most, which is the Savior of us all. For me, it is such an easy job, loving children.....rapture didn't happen on Saturday, but happiness came to me Sunday, as I am ready to embrace this special change that has come into my life at this time. I love Chris John. I love the sisters of the Agua Fria Ward, which I have been blessed to serve over for a few years now. I leave them in the tender care of Roxie Fisher. May God bless us all.